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Skinny Dipping Gone Terribly Wrong |
Written by Max, Starring Eric (Sturg), Max, Geo, & the Brittany's
It was a warm monday evening in July, my plans for the evening was to celebrate some good news I had just received and I planned on celebrating even if it met just getting hammered w/ Sturgie. But to my suprise, Sturgie shows up with Brittany and Brittany (I'm going to refer to all the ladies in this entry as Brittany, to protect the guilty). And next to arrive was Geo and Brittany. We were drinking for maybe an hour or two when someone says "let's go skinny dipping!" and amazingly it got unanimous approval. Only problem from my stand point was that this was one of the few nights in the summer that we didn't have the air conditioning on and all the windows were open. My dad's room was literally ten feet above from where we all stripped down to our bday suits. Naturally, I was doing a lot of shhh's when i wasn't trying to control the semi. I just lost it though when Geo lost control of the volume of his voice and his wood and started chasing Brittany around, Brittany giggling the whole time.
"Touch it, just go ahead touch it!" or "jump on it!" He said a lot worse I just can't remember, this is when Gregory (my dad) steps in and goes to the window.
"If you wanna swim then swim but if your going to be loud then just GO HOME!"... Days later he would say to me as we were painting "Who was that malado boy?.. He's a crude son of a gun isn't he." So yeah my dad saw all the Brittany's naked no doubt. Ohhh and as my sister was coming in Sturg goes right up to the sliding glass door, buck naked of course, and knocks and waves.. right when she realized what she was looking at her head jerked in the other direction like it had just been hit by a brick. Real nice sturg.
Everything was going great this night, until Sturg, Geo, and two of the Brittany's decide to streak a lap around the block. They didn't even make it out the end of my drive way before brittany tripped and took one of the most nastiest spills these eyes had ever seen. This is completely what Seinfeld was talking about with the whole "bad naked" concept. We're talking scrapes and bruses everywhere, you really woulda thought she had been beaten if you saw the rasberries and bruises that week. So of course that sucked the life right out of the night. |
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